the 'S' word


I’ve been stressing. Yah, just because the kids are all grown up [age 20 and 22] and out of the house means nothing. I still stress over their choices, their decisions. Over their hurts and heartaches. I worry about their money problems [their lack of anything resembling a budget!] and whether they are eating healthy. I stress over the bad habits they are developing, and over their choice of friends. I worry because they aren’t on our insurance anymore. I worry about needing braces [again!] and needing eye surgery.


One of my kids is moving again. This will be four times in a little over a year. She loses her down payment, she has-wear-and-tear on her furniture. She has utility deposits and cleaning deposits. [again!]


One of my kids has a broken heart. [again!] He’s been so in love for the past 8 months. My own heart aches for him. I want so much for him to have a wonderful, warm, fun, creative, supportive, Godly woman in his life.


One of my kids is way in over her head. Doesn’t know where the car payment is going to come from. She needs tires. None of the vehicles are dependable. She is too, too busy. She runs on full-speed-ahead all day. Her husband works 12-15 hours a day, 6 days a week.


I’ve been stressing over a DUI and attorney and court fees. Been stressing over medical bills and the changing [again!] of our insurance company and premiums. I’ve been stressing over my mammogram, colonoscopy, pap and knee.


Been stressing over Thanksgiving and the upcoming holidays. Already stressing about income tax. Hubby and I don’t speak the month before and after April 15th!


Yesterday I took stress into my own hands and I ate. I ate 7 Quaker white cheese rice cakes [much better than last week’s 14!] and had two bowls of Kashi dry cereal with 1% milk late at night! This after I had already eaten an apple, brocoli salad, and two frozen strawberry fruit bars. I was FAR from hungry. In fact I was stuffed before I started.

[Even though it wasn’t bad sugary, fatty, crappy food I was still overeating [bingeing!] because I wasn’t handling my feelings well.]

You know what I learned re-learned? IF HUNGER ISN’T THE PROBLEM FOOD ISN’T THE ANSWER!

Now I’m all bloated, miserable, gassy, tired [didn’t sleep at all last night] and back up two pounds.