16
Apr

idiosyncrasies

id·i·o·syn·cra·sy

[id-ee-uh–sing-kruh-see, –sin–] Or is it idiot*syn*crazy ?

We all have them. I sure have my share! At my age, I’m pretty set in my ways, so maybe that’s all it is. I’m used to things a certain way. In fact I’ll say it. I prefer things a certain way!

Sometimes my idiosyncrasies drive me nuts. Sometimes they drive everyone else nuts.

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I like to drive in the left lane on the highway. But not just to annoy people. I have good reason. It seems smoother to me. Sometimes when I’m with my son he kind of yells at the other people who are doing the same thing. “Get in the other lane, Mister!” and “Oh for goodness sakes, move over!” But he’s nice to me and doesn’t yell at me for doing the very same thing.

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I like to wear big dangly colorful hoop earrings to match my shirts. One day, granddaughter, Andie, saw them and said, “Oh no. No gramma, that’s just not right. Let me help you take those out.” But I still wear them. I have bright hot pink ones in this morning to match my top.

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I like to know the numbers of lots of things. Yesterday morning before school I was picking up trash in the parking lot. I had picked up quite a few bottles, cans, popped balloons etc., and it occured to me right then that there was a ton of stuff to pick up. So I dumped everything out of my bag and counted what I had already picked up. 23. Then I continued to pick up the rest. I estimated there was at least 70 things dumped out of assorted teen’s cars. When I was done, it was a total of 79 pieces of litter this morning. I mentioned to my friend, Becky, what pigs we have for students. If I hadn’t counted, I would have never known just how big of pigs they all are!

I count everything, and yes, it drives me crazy.

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I add water to my ‘cream’ soups, but I poach my eggs in milk. I realize that drives hubby crazy for some reason. I make my scrambled eggs with water and he says, “If you are fixing scrambled eggs, don’t put water in them!” I like salsa on my bakers and he likes sour cream. I like 1% milk. He likes whole. I don’t like beef and just the thought of bacon makes me ill. And he eats both of them until the house smells like a truck stop. So I think we all have idiosyncrasies when it comes to food.

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I sleep on my left side facing right. And I have the wrinkles on my face to prove it. In fact when I look in the mirror, I see that one side of my face is down a good quarter of an inch compared to the other side and I often wonder if it has something to do with sleeping on that cheek for the past 30 years. Even when we are camping I have to face that way, so I sometimes have to sleep with my sleeping bag zipper next to the wall, as long as I’m facing the direction I’m used to.

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I put on my socks before I put on my pants. If I forget, I take off my pants and do it the way I’m used to. Otherwise my socks aren’t pulled up far enough and I feel a draft all day. Please tell me you do that too. It doesn’t seem at all unreasonable to me.
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Something I do that does annoy me is when I incorrectly assume a conversation is over, and I walk away without really ending it. And I hear people saying “Uh. Oh, OK, then, goodbye; have a nice day,” from a distance and I realize again, that I should have said, “Ok, I’ll see you later,” or something equally appropriate before heading off.
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I check my nose, teeth and hair approximately seven hundred times a day. I’m slightly paranoid about having anything in any of those places. If I walk past a total stranger’s car I check in the side-view mirror. I check in the reflection of a spoon. And I check each time I pass one of the nineteen bathrooms in the school. Why? Because inevitably whenever I am talking to someone they are rubbing their nose or wiping their mouth or picking at their teeth and I think they are trying to tell me something [in a nice and unobvious way.] [Little do they know how very obvious it is!]

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I talk to myself constantly. This might be because we are empty nesters and hubby doesn’t say thirty words to me a day. [Except when he tells me to not put water in his scrambled eggs!] I talk to myself as if there is actually another person standing right next to me all day long. And sometimes I even act surprised at what I say. “Oh really! I didn’t know that!” I’ll say. Or “Don’t tell me you are heading out in this cold without a coat!” “Oh it’s not really that cold, it’s more wind than anything.”

I laugh when I see someone else doing the same thing. Their lips are moving a hundred miles an hour and they look at me sheepishly when our eyes meet. They say, “Oops you caught me having a deep conversation with myself.” And I’m all, “Yup, I know just what you’re saying!”

People used to say “You don’t have to worry unless you start answering yourself back.” Well, then, I probably should start worrying!
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I like to park my car as far away from a store as possible. Some people do that for the exercise. I like to do it so I can find my car. I hate pushing my loaded shopping cart in and out of all the cars and around all the rows close to the building. Instead, I know I can walk out any lane as far away from the store as I can and I’ll usually spot my car in an uncongested area out by a tree or a a raised grassy spot on the perimeter of the parking lot.

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I hate when people use [non]words like unthaw, flustrated, and irregardless. But then I turn around and use [non]words like ginormous. I equally dislike when people say larnyx instead of larynx and pharnyx instead of pharynx.

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I sometimes smell my belly button. I once had a yeast infection and it manifested itself right there in my middle. So every once in a while I take a Q-tip and check it out. That might sound disgusting, but I’m pretty sure everyone on the planet has something like that.

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I emailed Scott to see if he thought I had any idiosyncrasies and boy howdy. He sent me a list!

1-answering the phone anytime it rings (unless you are at home)- the movie theater, an airplane, in the car, on a sleigh ride to see the elk

2-constantly weighing and measuring yourself and then reporting to the world

3-suduko puzzles in front of the toilet

4-signing up for any weekend overtime- “if its time and a half I’m there”-“16 hours?  No problem.”

5-recording asinine shows all day that no else would ever watch and only having one TV upstairs

6-the basement, out of sight out of mind… out of control, and possibly a health code violation

Seriously? I wouldn’t have guessed any of those.

Later I called Tracy and she listed a few as well. She said I go back and check my car three times to make sure it is locked. That’s quite a trip some days because I park my car out on the perimeter of the parking lot, remember?

She also mentioned a few small things that I don’t really consider idiosyncrasies. She said I am obsessed with numbers, saying the alphabet backwards, pretending I’m jumping over the blizzard posts as I drive along the highway [in the left lane, mind you] counting the crystals on the chandeliers in the temple and saying “Ancient Chinese Secret” every single time I am taking little tiny steps.

OK, I’ll giver her that one.

2 thoughts on “idiosyncrasies”

  1. weighingmatters Post author

    I have no clue what happened to my COMMENTS. Tracy is supposed to be figuring it out for me. I hired her to be my blogger expert. I actually gave her money for it and she bought darling Fiesta Dinnerware. Oh, maybe that came from when I hired her to be my tax expert. I don’t remember. Anyway. If YOU know how to fix my comments, please let Tracy know.

  2. tracy Post author

    I was raised by this woman.

    This post says all you ever need to know about why I am crazy.

    Actually, as you probably know, I adore my mother. We talk between five and ten times a day. We laugh so hard we pee our pants. She is a fabulous grandma. She is brilliant, creative, funny, devoted, long-suffering, determined, hard working, and self-sacrificing. She is simply wonderful.

    In spite of all that she is also quite bizarre…and so am I.

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