I have an addictive personality, right? I don’t really like to say those words, but I know it’s true. I’m excessive in several areas of my life and it pretty much makes me wonder if I’m broken. Wait. I don’t really wonder any more. But, broken doesn’t mean worthless. I do know that! It often means I might have to take a few extra precautions or work a little harder to fit in with every one else. [Actually, I think we’re all a little broken or obsessive or ridiculous in some areas. We’re all a little sick. Only some of us know it, though.]
My newest addiction is word games. Words with Friends and Scramble with Friends.
My goodness. I spend at least an hour every single day playing nonsensical games. Oh. Wait. That doesn’t count the Sudoku games and Word Genius that I also play. Oh. And, I got another Word Search game from Tracy the last time I was at her house. I play that too.
Usually, I turn on the Mormon Channel when I get in bed and listen to Church History while I wind down with a game. Or twenty.
I wonder why I can’t do anything half way. Why do I have to go to extremes. Why do I have to play, like twenty games. What’s wrong with playing one? One day I, seriously, was playing with 23 people at the same time. What the cow? And, every time I head downstairs to play on the computer, Mikelle says something like, “Oh my gosh, you spend more time on the computer than anyone I know! Stay up here and visit with me!!!” I find myself pretending to go to the bathroom and then sneaking down the stairs. When I finish a few games I sneak in the bathroom and flush.
Really sick, I know.
And, I don’t want Easton to hear me go down. So I have to stay on the far right of the staircase hugging the wall because the left side squeaks with every step. When he hears me go down he has to follow me and sit on my lap. I really can’t play very well with an 18-month old hitting the keys.
I need to do something a little more constructive with my life. It’s just I’m at a point where I feel like I’ve done everything for 50 years and I don’t care if I’m lazy or if I play games all day or if I don’t feel like doing what other people think is important. I mean, I don’t feel like sewing, knitting, painting. I don’t want to do genealogy or a whole bunch of deep cleaning. I just want to do the necessities and then play a word game.
I’m wasting my life.
At least I don’t sit in the recliner and watch The Price is Right. Or Dr. Phil. I don’t sit all day and watch mindless TV.
So what if my life isn’t the same as someone else’s. I’m happy and I’m connected to enough people that I feel fine. I study my Gospel Doctrine lesson each week. I get the dishes and laundry done and vacuum at least once a week. I make my bed every day.
Oh man. I think I’m starting to sound defensive.
I was really trying to work my way around to the subject of my brand new iPOD that came yesterday via UPS. I was trying to justify buying one because, well, why shouldn‘t I have one. I’ve worked my whole dang life and I can have an iPOD to play games on, if I want. Right?
Seriously, why do I need an iPAD and an iPOD. And a Kindle.