19
Jan

change your life

I’ve been up since 4 a.m. Saturday. Saturday at 4 a.m. Saturday morning. Sleep-in-morning! My reward for working hard all week and getting up at 4 a.m. Monday through Friday morning. I don’t get it.

It’s 6 a.m. now and I have three batches of laundry done. I’ve re-listened to President Monson’s October 2012 Conference talk again. I’ve played at least ten games of Solitaire and checked my Words with Friends. I’ve wiped the cabinets and put away yesterdays dishes. I’ve gotten out my cute little XOXO craft that I want to finish this weekend.

Sheesh. I could be cutting the ZZZZs.

This week I have so very much to be grateful for. First of all I’m grateful for my daughter’s outlook on life. She has had one heck of a couple of months. She’s been dealing with a damaged hip for almost a year. She’s been dealing with injections for about five months. She’s been dealing with a new diagnosis of Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome for about three weeks. She’s been dealing with being basically bed-ridden for several of the past 12 months but sometimes not consecutively and sometimes not consistently. [There have actually been times when she was able to walk just like everyone else. . . . but she usually paid dearly for it later on.] And most recently she has been having massive infusions to restore her insufficient vitamin/mineral stores in her tired body.

And then, as if all that weren’t enough . . . [I don’t really dare say something like that, like what else can happen, because I’m afraid we’ll find out!] Richard was hit head-on and totaled their brand new [to them] one-day-old car!

You know what she said about all of it when I told her, sheesh . . . how do you keep going? How can you handle all of this? I’m totally overwhelmed.

She said, I have found out that Heavenly Father knows me personally, blesses me personally, watches over me personally and that his angles protect us. They have protected me this past year, and they protected my Richard this week. We are both, gratefully, still alive to raise our children . . .

I need an attitude like that!

There is a sign in the FCSA room that I ready every single day.

Change your Attitude and Change your Life!

I’ve been listening to Sherri Dew’s interview on Conversations on the Mormon Channel. I’ve listened over and over. She inspiries me and countless other women.

Is it possible to be happy when life is hard? And to feel peace amid uncertainty? Is it possible to change — to shake off old habits and become new again? Is it possible to live with integrity and purity in a world that no longer values the virtues that distinguish the followers of Christ? Yes; the answer is yes because of Jesus Christ, Whose atonement has assured that we need not bear the burdens of mortality alone. There is nothing this confused world needs more, nothing that inspires a greater sense of well being, nothing that has greater power to strengthen families than the gospel of Jesus Christ.

About her own life she says:

My life has not turned out like I thought it would or how I hoped it would. And with every passing year I think, OK, seriously? We’re going to click off another birthday and I’m still not married? Really? Or I’m still doing things that probably weren’t my choice?

There are certain things that because of the nature of my life I totally understand. I understand disappointment. I understand loneliness. I really get that. I understand what feels like rejection. I understand the feeling of isolation. And I just think, oh my goodness! But I also have had experiences that I would have never seen coming and would have never thought possible for a little girl from Kansas.

There have been joyous experiences and privileges that have been amazing.

I have felt the pain and I wrestle with it to this day. I’ve had joy I never deserved, but I’m grateful for. In times of pain I simply don’t know how I would have survived if it weren’t for coming to understand that when the Lord said he would heal our broken hearts, he was serious about it. And it is physical and tangible and real. I don’t know what I would have done if I hadn’t learned a long time ago that I could find comfort, solace and instruction in the temple. I don’t know what I would have done if I hadn’t been able to figure out what it feels like to open the scriptures and see something leap off the page and it’s like “Do you get it Sherri? It’s My verse for you today. That’s what I need you to understand today.”

When asked how she can belong to a church that is so focused on family and marriage, when she herself has never been married, Sherri says: Every part of joy in my life has come because of the gospel, not in spite of it. His doctrine, His Gospel and all the blessings He has given us.

I can understand why some people would resort to some artificial means to try to introduce peace into their lives when they don’t have the gospel and especially when pain strikes. I think I can see why that happens.

Isn’t she amazing!?!

Today I’m grateful for Tracy’s attitude, and Sherri Dew’s attitude! I want this year to be better, brighter, happier, more full of love and happiness and peace and joy. I want to be the source of much of that, myself. I want to find it in others. I want to change my life for the better and I want to be able to see that difference in January 2014.