what I learned thursday night around 8 p.m.

Do not start to work on your nails right before bed time.

Don’t try to take off last week’s polish with non-acetone remover.

Don’t soak your fingers in a bowl of warm soapy water until they are totally pruned.

Don’t use the wrong kind of Super Glue [the gel type] to salvage your breaks.

Don’t try to file the glue until it’s actually dry.

Don’t touch the glue with your other fingers to test it’s dryness.

Don’t put on the first coat until the glue is dry. [This wrong gel glue takes over 30 minutes to dry.]

Don’t use a new sallow yellow color you’ve always hated but suddently feel sorry for.

Don’t put on the two coats without letting the first one dry completely.

Don’t try to fix the messed up nails with even more sallow polish.

Don’t forget to take off your long sleeved shirt before you start.

Don’t try to put on your fuzzy blue PJ’s.

Don’t believe for one minute that if you hold your hands on top of the covers you won’t accidently forget and turn over and get your nails stuck to 1. your pillow case, 2. your eye lashes.

Don’t forget to buy the right kind of Super Glue and acetone remover the next time you go to the store [on Friday] so you don’t have to drive the 12 miles back the second you get home.

Seriously.

sleep

The Life of an Overeating, Under-sleeping, Under-active, Middle aged,
Health-seeking Woman with a Need to Blog

I fall asleep almost every night on the couch. Depending on when I arouse, usually nine or ten o’clock, I make my way into the bedroom trying very hard to not wake myself all the way up. Or else I’ll lay in bed unable to fall back asleep.

It used to drive me nuts when my mom and dad fell asleep in their recliner chairs watching Lawrence Welk or Perry Mason. Later they watched Hawaii Five-Oh and Jeopardy. They laid there with crooked necks and mouths hanging wide open, a little line of drool just dropping off the bottom lip. I’d think, “Why don’t you just go to bed for Pete’s sake! You do this every single night. It can’t possibly be doing you any good. Go to bed and get some quality sleep.”

Now it’s me. I’ve grown into my parents! I pile up the couch pillows and get all comfy to watch NCIS reruns, fully intending to watch all the way through. But pretty quickly I hear a snort and startle myself back into awareness. I rewind NCIS to where I must have dozed off and get all comfy again, only to wake myself up fifteen or so minutes later. Some nights I go through this same scene three or four times before I decide I’m too tired to watch TV. On my way to bed I glance at the clock and mentally calculate how many hours I have til it’s time to get up for work. Let’s see, 10 to 4 a.m. is six hours. Crap. I should have gone to bed sooner!

It takes me a while to get the temperature right. I sleep with one foot out. I like to slide my foot around until I find a cool place. And I get up in the middle of the night to open the window, even though I can hear every single car and semi that passes by. The sand hill cranes and geese are really noisy right now too. We live across a dirt road from a river and a little pond where birds of all migratory practices seem to stop over on their way to various destinations, spring and fall.

I usually have to use the bathroom twice a night. I try not to wake up fully. The dogs bark several times through the night and Jack wants out as well. I’m pretty sure I don’t get many REM’s.

About two or three a.m. I start noticing the digital. I think, OK, I still have an hour or an hour and a half. Try, try to relax and fall asleep. Then I start blogging in my head! I have all sorts of long conversations about what I could possibly post. It is not restful! It is not sane. It is not practical. It is not healthy.

Researchers found that people who sleep two to four hours a night are 73% more likely to be obese than those who get seven to nine hours. Those who get five hours of sleep a night are 50% more likely to be obese than normal sleepers. Those who sleep six hours are 23% more likely to be obese.

And the researchers reported those who get 10 or more hours are 11 % less likely to be obese!

In a way, the latest findings seem counterintuitive because most people think that sleeping too much contributes to making people fat, but they found the opposite is true.

They believe that sleep-deprived people eat more because they are hungrier, they’re awake longer and may be temped by foods everywhere they go. They often consume far more calories than they burn in the extra hours they’re awake.

If I could just go to sleep at 7 p.m. every night this week in my own bed I can get off these last couple pounds! I could be in the group of people who get ten hours of sleep and are 11% less likely to be obese!

No better still, I will wire my mouth shut, and do sit ups while I watch NCIS. Then I’ll be actively burning calories, it will keep me awake so I can get through the show in the usual 22 minutes and not three hours of rewinding and starting it over. And I’ll get to bed by 8 or 8:30 so I can sleep a healthy eight hours before getting up at 4:30.

Sounds like a plan.

s.i.g.h.

oh, so very random

I’m not sure how this ever finally happened but hubby has just cut out at least seven darling crafts for me to work on and paint and love. [I'm married to a carpenter for Pete's sake, but he hardly ever cuts for me!] He has measured cut and mitered for the last two hours [I love the smell of cut wood!] and I am giddy with excitement. Now I can make the big framed heart w/chicken wire I stole from Tracy years ago. Mikelle has been wanting one ever since she stole it from me and I stole it back. If only I had my camera here, you’d truly understand how cute this project is!

[Stephen took the camera to Mexico yesterday for the bonding Guy-Cruise made up of Scott, Cameron, and Steeevo.] [Interesting story about the camera -- but that's another post. Or is it? I'll just say that Bridget bought the camera for Stephen for graduation. He broke up with her and needed money so he offered to sell it to me for $50 [worth much more but he was desperate] and hubby upped the bid to $75 and took it right out from under my nose. But I bought a new charger, new memory card and connections to the computer, so I believe with all my heart that it is at least half mine.]

Anyhoo!

Forget about the manicure, I’m going to paint and sand and stain until the cows come home. Oh dear. I’ve used that phrase twice recently and I don’t want to analyze why, but it is now suddenly worrisome to me.

I’ll never tell Mrs. E about this because she will ask, “And how does that make you feel?”

Oh my gosh! As if I don’t have enough to worry about without thinking this might be related to my emotional or psychological well-being.

I kid you not. The other day I said “This desk is only about 3/4 inch so we’ll have to be careful how long of screw to put in it.” And she said, “Does that make you feel smart? How do you feel right now? I would feel smart if I said something like that. Do you feel smart?”

s.c.r.e.a.m!

[I'm going to go paint now . . .]

that’s 1-800-drlaura

Ok. Truth Tube.

I officially will have to lie about my weight or not post it at all.

The only good thing I’ve managed is I shopped yesterday and bought fruits and veggies, yogurt, frozen fruit bars, whole wheat and spinach wraps, 1% milk, Fiber One cereal, Great Harvest honey whole wheat bread [oops, and a raspberry/white chocolate chip scone] eggs, and low-fat string cheese so it would appear I’m making good food choices — but, um, yah, there’s a big struggle going on [again!]

It’s Saturday morning and I have no excuses. No stress, no work. And I can make it through the day without blowing it — if I stay focused.

Yesterday on my little ‘craft run’ to Ogden [Quilted Bear, Home Depot, Michael's, Robert's, Lowe's -- yes I drove 120 miles to Ogden to buy the letter 'R' to match some other wood letters I bought in SLC last week] — so on my trip — I made a mental list of good or healthy things I had done for myself. I thought If I can do 5.five.5 a day, that would be good, wouldn’t it? [Ten would be better!] Surely that would make a difference in how I eat or treat myself. So I started ticking them off:

1. ate an 2 oranges
2. ate three hard boiled eggs
3. wore a cute outfit, took extra time getting ready for work
4. went to Ogden/started a craft project — developing/sharing talents
5. bought healthy food

I listened to Dr. Laura all the way. A caller called in about her weight and Dr. Laura gave it to her about being weak, making excuses and being bored. It really hit me where I live [and where I eat!] Dr. Laura said discipline gets boring. The little kid in us wants to revert back to eating junk and being careless with our health and being spoiled and self-centered. Instead we have to do the opposite. We have to think clearly and logically about what we eat and how we move. Sure we want to eat a slice of cake or a peanut and butter and jam sandwich or a hot fudge — all those comfort foods that made us feel like our Mom loved and adored us when we were six. But we are the Mom now. We are our own Mom so we need to [give ourselves love and protection] extend to ourselves that same feeling of love and adoration that we felt at age six. Only now, we need to feed ourselves steamed broccoli and braised salmon and pomegranates and Greek yogurt and spinach and whole grains and walnuts and one piece of dark, dark cacao. That’s what someone eats when they love themselves!

OK, Dr. Laura. I’m so ready to have a good day. I’m so ready to see those numbers go down.

[Trying very hard to be honest, although I can hardly stand it today! But I'm going to camouflage it so only I will know how far I've failed this week.]

[okreadyi'mbackuptoonehundredyikesandyukfortyickysixpoundsandahalf!]

S.i.g.h.

bar j & slc

We held our yearly local fund raiser featuring the Bar J Wranglers from Jackson. What a talented, funny entertaining bunch! I visited with them one-on-one as they set up sound and equipment and enjoyed hearing some of their personal experiences. I called granddaughter, Andie, while I was on the stage listening to them warm up and she was so impressed with me! [I think] The event was well attended and the pre-auction successful. One picture from home-town-favorite, Jim Norton went for $4000! A beautiful oil with his signature Indians on horses walking through a stream and beautiful, magnificent mountains, foliage and trees in the background. Stunning.

Today I’m heading to SLC to “babysit” for Tracy’s three youngest while she, Richard and Blythe attend a T.J. Ed Forum filled with educational, spiritual and motivating classes and then the yearly ball — which is a must go, must see! This is getting to be quite the adventure. The little ones with Grommer in the swimming pool, at the ice cream shop, at the movies, at the mall, at a park or the zoo, at the ice cream shop [again!] . . . This year Keziah is running a triathlon in American Fork, so part of Saturday will be spent there while she tries her little heart out! And I’m thinking, since we are driving right past Quilted Bear in Murray, a quick stop might be happening.

Weight wise: 142.5 this morning. Worried about spending a weekend away from my food. Worried about those ice creams. Worried I’ll abandon my three-day old [fairly successful] plan. I was just getting on a r.o.l.l ! I so hate having three great days and then not being able to follow through for the weekend.

But, got a p.l.a.n!  Taking a small cooler with frozen fruit, yogurt, walnuts, eggs, and fresh veggies and fruits.

I long for normal. I’m sure other normal people don’t panic about a Friday through Sunday away from home. I’m sure other people manage quite fine. And so I’m going to work hard at hanging on to what I’ve managed this week and maybe taking a walk or actually exerting myself at the park. Something that burns calories.

Sunday we’re all about attending services at the Church on 200 North 200 West in SLC. It has the most magnificent stained glass window of the first vision. There is plenty of folklore about it coming across the plains piece by piece — or from Europe — something amazing. Last year Tracy’s family ended up in a Russian speaking branch, just so they could attend church there.

Ciao . . .

yippee for a spanish-speaking son

OK. It feels like an entirely new lifetime for me. A new beginning. I can finally concentrate on all the things that are important to me. Clean slate. Here’s a list of the things I can hardly wait to do for me:

1. I want to study today’s Gospel Doctrine lesson before 1 p.m. I scanned over it last Sunday afternoon [Gee, that seems like a lifetime ago!] and I know it’s on the birthright blessing: the marriage covenant. It’s all about Isaac and Rebekah and Jacob and Leah and Rachel. I love this story in Genesis.

2. I want to clean my bedroom. Enough said.

3. I want to get caught up on laundry.

4. I want to clean out my car and find the sour smell under the driver’s seat.

5. I want to clean out the fridge. I’ve been eating tournament food for three days and want to get back to fresh fruits and veggies. I can hardly wait to eat some Bruce’s cereal with frozen raspberries and walnuts. Maybe a sprinkle of wheat germ and some flax. Oh. It’s Fast Sunday. Maybe later.

6. I want to soak in the tub and slather on some ‘smell-good.’

7. I want to find the clothes I bought at Eddie Bauers last Saturday in Park City with Scott and Andie and see if any of them still look cute. I remember shopping, paying for and carrying them in a bag to the car but haven’t seen them since. I remember they were on my bed one day but I haven’t made it all week so they may be lost.

8. I want to clean the bathroom. I’m so embarrassed that Mikelle and Logan [apparently] came for the weekend and saw the house the way it was. I left at 4:45 each morning and got home around 8 at night, so I didn’t actually see them, but I heard they were here!

9. I want to turn the clock back so that I can say Happy Birthday to brother Rob, son-in-law Richard and cousin Kathy on the 4th, 5th and 6th, respectfully, so I can be on time for their birthday well-wish.

10. I want to put the ink in my printer that I’ve had sitting here beside it for over a month.

11. I want to call my grandchildren.

12. I want to find out the details of our summer vacation. Scott texted “We’re booked and I feel good about it” last Tuesday or Wednesday but I’ve not had time to find out any more. I know it’s in Playa del Carmen on the Yucatan the second or third week in June, but that’s about all. Yippee for a Spanish-speaking son who takes care of details!

Today’s the Sabbath and I’m shooting for #1 and #6. Let the rest take care of itself for another couple days.

the proper use of brackets

One of my very favorite people in the whole world says I don’t know how to use brackets. I admit I use them a lot. [I try to use them at least seventeen times in each post.] [However, I don't think I'll make it to that number in this post.]

Valuable punctuation tips on how to implement the basic rules of punctuation into your every day writing.

Although there is a trend towards the minimal use of punctuation in the addressing of letters, it is essential to maintain correct punctuation in the body of the letter in order to convey the writer’s precise meaning.  Remember, punctuation is powerful—one punctuation mark can change the whole meaning of a sentence.

An English professor wrote the words: “A woman without her man is nothing“ on the board and asked his students to punctuate it correctly.

All of the males in the class wrote:  “A woman, without her man, is nothing.“

All the females in the class wrote:   “A woman: without her, man is nothing.“

…Punctuation is powerful!…

I love to use brackets! I don’t care for the (parentheses) or the {curvy things – braces} or  <these> or many of the other things I don’t even know the names of . . .<lol.> [Just kidding!] [OK, I admit my tongue is lodged firmly in my right cheek!]

Let me just say, I know I use them incorrectly! But I love them! So what can possibly be incorrect about that?

Parentheses are like polite back seat drivers. (They interrupt to explain additional information that the reader should know. Parentheses can hold explanations, illustrations, or clarifications.)

I know that! [I just choose to use brackets for the very same thing!]

Week’s End

This morning I drove from Logan to Lyman at 7:30 a.m. I wanted to get home in time for the meetings in my own ward. I’ve learned I love my ward, my people, my bishopric, my bench. I love my neighbors, my friends, my sisters, my gospel doctrine teacher.

I could have stayed in Logan. I could have worn something of Mikelle’s and been just fine. But I wanted to be in my ward.

This comes as a surprise to me because just a few weeks ago I wanted to be anywhere BUT my ward!. I was still frustrated with someone and wasn’t comfortable seeing her on Sundays.[I'm all over that, finally.] For four weeks I attended the two other wards in my building. I wanted it to be the same — after all, it’s not like I was staying home on the Sabbath; I was attending!

But it wasn’t the same! I was in the same building. I was with people I have known for the past thirty years. People I love and admire. People I have connections with in other areas of my life. People I work with or see several times a week. But it wasn’t my ward.

This morning everything was back to normal. A dear friend who gave me a big hug last week was there. My friend Teri and her two daughters sat on my row. Several friends asked about hubby and his knee replacement, all offering help, meals and support. A new sister in the ward taught the lesson and I’m so glad I didn’t miss it. She’s a phenomenal teacher! A visitor cried as she poured out her heart and thoughts about stay-at-home mothers who have so much to give and contribute to society. She touched us all. The music was wonderful! Two darling little sisters, age 4 and 7, sang a Primary song ["I Lived in Heaven a Long Time Ago, It Is True"] during our Relief Society lesson. We had a great discussion about Abraham and the Abrahamic Covenant in Sunday School class. The Westons’ spoke in Sacrament meeting about having a good foundation in our lives, in our families.

It was an extraordinary day.

I’m sure most people feel the same way. I’m sure they have important, supportive, special, uplifting connections with others that are monumental in their lives. I’m sure they have a network of sisterhood, devotion, love and friendship. I’ve always known I had it.

I just didn’t realize how significant it was in my own life.

:]

Noah

I’ve been reading Genesis and Moses in the PGP. I came across this little quiz on one of the commentary sites I read every week. Oh boy, do I ever have a lot to learn! This is one of the stories (and there a lots of them) that we seem to learn from hearsay rather than personal study. This all from Ted Gibbons.

Here’s the quiz. Hope you do better than I did!

1. Noah was 500 years old when it started to rain T___F___

2. Noah was commanded to put two of every species in the ark T___F___

3. It began to rain as soon as the ark was loaded and the door was shut T___F___

4. Noah was in the ark for about 6 months T___F___

5. The ark was about the length of a football field T___F___

6. The ark had a door and a window T___F___

7. The ark did not float until after forty days of rain T___F___

8. The water covered everything for 150 days T___F___

I took the test and got nearly half of them wrong.

The quiz questions all come from Genesis and the actual account of the deluge.

1. Noah was 500 years old when it started to rain. FALSE. Noah was 600 years old (Genesis7:6)

2. Noah was commanded to put two of every species in the ark. FALSE. Clean beasts were taken into the ark by sevens. (See Genesis 6:19; 7:2)

3. It began to rain as soon as the ark was loaded and the door was shut. FALSE. The rains began after 7 days on the ark. (Genesis 7:8-10)

4. Noah was in the ark for about 6 months. FALSE. The rains began in the second month of the six hundredth year, on the seventeenth day. (Genesis 7:11). It was the next year in the second month on the twenty-seventh day that God told Noah to leave the ark. (Genesis 8:14-16). They were in the ark for 375 days, plus one week before the rains began.

5. The ark was about the length of a football field. FALSE. The ark was 300 cubits. An Old Testament cubit is about 18 inches. Thus the ark was 450 feet long—about a football field and one half.

6. The ark had a door and a window. PROBABLY FALSE. That there was a door is beyond question. The animals and people must have and left entered the ark thereby. Genesis 6:16 speaks of the door, but also of a window. But the footnote for the word window in that verse tells us this: HEB. Tsohar; some rabbis believed it was a precious stone that shone in the dark.

Sending out the dove and the raven (Genesis 8:7-12) suggests that the outside world was not readily visible.  In fact. Noah could not see the outside until he “removed the covering of the ark, and looked . . .” (Genesis 8:13). The book of Ether suggests that the Jaredite barges were in some ways like the ark (see Ether 6:7). Perhaps it was from the records carried by the Jaredites that the brother of Jared got the idea for the shining stones used to light the windowless barges his people used to cross the ocean. There isreference in the Jaredite account to the absence of windows in the barges (see Ether 2:23).

7. The ark did not float until after forty days of rain. TRUE. (Genesis 7:17)

8. The water covered everything for 150 days. TRUE. (Genesis 7:24; 8:3) The ark is a symbol. It was real enough, but for those of us who sense the rising and engulfing tides of wickedness and faithlessness in our own day, there is an additional lesson here. We must prepare for the safety of our families by building arks. They will be refuges for us when waves of sin threaten to capsize us and our families.  If we have built arks of scripture study and made them tight; if we have built arks of prayer and made them tight; if we have built arks of obedience and covenant-keeping and made them tight, then our homes and our lives will be like the barges of the Jaredites:

Why make them tight? You’ve seen the game Red Rover. One side links arms and then cries, “Red Rover! Red Rover! Send Danny (or someone else) right over!” Then Danny runs at full speed to the spot he thinks weakest in the linkage of arms and tris to break through. But if the other team is holding tightly enough, he will be held back and kept out. We must hold on to the word of God, to our prayers and scripture study and our covenants and our obedience, that tightly, tightly enough to repel every effort of Lucifer to break through and interrupt our joy.

“And it came to pass that when they were buried in the deep there was no water that could hurt them, their vessels being tight like unto a dish, and also they were tight like unto the ark of Noah; therefore when they were encompassed about by many waters they did cry unto the Lord, and he did bring them forth again upon the top of the waters” (Ether 6:7).

multi-tasking

What a great day! Yesterday we ran to Ogden to do a few things. I got so many things crossed off my to-do list, and did some other things that weren’t even on it.

• got a part for my vacuum from the Sears parts place
• got money out of my credit union for a payment on Mikelle’s new washer and dryer
• made that payment while I got the vacuum part! How’s that for killing two birds!
• slipped into Dillards while Scott and Andie were at the food court and bought a pair of Dansko’s I had looked at during Christmas break up in Idaho Falls. They were on sale! It took three minutes!

• bought Scott his birthday present, a Carhartt hoodie to match his green vest. [It didn't match -- there are about six different Carhartt greens. Oh well. It looks good with black.]

• bought a new Camelback water bottle with help from granddaughter, Andie, to get the correct color [lime green]

• found a tire for hubby’s snow machine trailer. Scott and I had tried three other places and had given up but on a whim I tried one more place.
• bought a darling Christmas stocking for half price that I plan to duplicate next year. So, so cute, huh Andie. We saw it last November but couldn’t justify paying $21 for one stocking! I feel much better about it now.
• bought a few more glasses at Sam’s. These are 1.75 and used for scoring. Most of my others are 1.5 and I have to wear two of them for really close-up work. I feel pretty stupid wearing two pair of glasses, so I had to get them!
• ate at Chuck-a-Rama. Delish! I had squash, four kinds of salad, a little roast beef, steamed veggies, green beans. Dilish, again!
• Then got a week’s groceries at Wal-Mart on the way home.

I feel so organized — ready for the coming week. Can’t wait to wear my new shoes to church.

And I’ve had such a good week — health-wise — that I now am the proud owner of a body that weighs 140.5! [not necessarily a good emotional week since I'm still frustrated with the whole work incident!] Even after all that food at Chuck’s and having company this weekend. I’ve exercised almost every single day. And I have been ultra careful about what foods I’m eating.

140.5! YEAH!